That mood from the last post has very much passed and I'm in a stupendous mood at the moment. That is all
Mahalo
2.25.2006
2.23.2006
Emotional Low Ahead...Watch Your Head
As I sit in front of my computer, Whitesnake and Queensryche plays in the background. The clicking of keys and the rock voices of Ian Astbury and others drift over the sound of Starcraft and The Little Einsteins in the background. The glass in front of me contains 1 part Cruzan rum and 1 part coke. The pack of cigarettes stare me in the face, begging me for just one smoke. Just one and the world will be a better place. I don't want a cigarette. I don't even want to smoke. I barely do now, only under two circumstances: Instances of incredible stress, and instances of depression. My mood darkened and finally fell to black approximately 30 minutes ago. The sound of ice preceding the sound of the rum falling from the bottle. Ice cracked and rose as the glass slowly filled. I went from flying so high today. But like Icarus my wings have melted and I have crashed to earth. To earth with a realisation of some sort. My mind tries to find what conclusion it has come to. It's as clueless as I am. I haven't been really and truly depressed in a long time. Especially in light of the happiness I've felt recently this strikes me as odd. Am I manic/depressant? Am I just simply caught in a funk? Is there no communication in this car? We can't stop here, it's bat country.
I long for new words from Hunter S. Thompson. I crave to hear the Gonzo report from the frontlines of the American way. I'm pulling the plug on my RPG playtest. I had only one person that responded and he is now in Great Lakes making possibly the second biggest mistake of his life. The first was not taking my advice 3 years ago. I've decided that this RPG is not going anywhere. I've been writing and pushing for this thing for close to 3 years now. I'm tired. I'm spent and paper thin as far as my dreams for this thing go. I want to sleep. I haven't slept for 3 nights now. No one knows this. When you're in the middle of sleep deprivation everything is a copy of a copy of a copy. I want to feel the warmth of the sun and feel the rumble of thunder. We can swim out to the ocean. Leave them far behind. Swim out past the breakers. Watch the world die.
The glass is empty, only melted ice and the diluted mixture of dark estate rum and coke intermingled with the water shed from the disintegrating ice cubes. The son winds up his plastic puppy and watched it lurch across the floor. The sounds of Protoss Carriers releasing their payload of Interceptors all performing an aerial ballet to a soundtrack of Lords of Acid and Tool. Ian Astbury still sings sings of his Fire Woman and tells us that She Sells Sanctuary. All will be right with the world tomorrow I am sure of it.
I long for new words from Hunter S. Thompson. I crave to hear the Gonzo report from the frontlines of the American way. I'm pulling the plug on my RPG playtest. I had only one person that responded and he is now in Great Lakes making possibly the second biggest mistake of his life. The first was not taking my advice 3 years ago. I've decided that this RPG is not going anywhere. I've been writing and pushing for this thing for close to 3 years now. I'm tired. I'm spent and paper thin as far as my dreams for this thing go. I want to sleep. I haven't slept for 3 nights now. No one knows this. When you're in the middle of sleep deprivation everything is a copy of a copy of a copy. I want to feel the warmth of the sun and feel the rumble of thunder. We can swim out to the ocean. Leave them far behind. Swim out past the breakers. Watch the world die.
The glass is empty, only melted ice and the diluted mixture of dark estate rum and coke intermingled with the water shed from the disintegrating ice cubes. The son winds up his plastic puppy and watched it lurch across the floor. The sounds of Protoss Carriers releasing their payload of Interceptors all performing an aerial ballet to a soundtrack of Lords of Acid and Tool. Ian Astbury still sings sings of his Fire Woman and tells us that She Sells Sanctuary. All will be right with the world tomorrow I am sure of it.
2.07.2006
City of Heroes update.
Just throwing up a quick post because after close to 18 months i've finally gotten IB to Security Level 50. He is now 'Hero of the City' It's kinda hard at the same time too. It's not that I can't play him anymore, but that there's no real need to aside from helping people out if they need it. But there's no more advancement for him. That's it. Now he just gets to sit around and look pretty. Though with getting him to Level 50 it opens up the epic archetypes to play. Though IB's been something of a favorite of mine in that game. He exists on several servers and now thanks to the RP section of our forums now has an incredibly complicated backstory and future. Here's the screenshot I took of the last time IB's gonna ding
Also here is a pic of the Kheldian who is taking his place. It's his daughter from another time and dimension. As I said he's got quite the complicated story surrounding him now and it's kind of coming to fruition now.
I think that's about all of the updating that I can handle for one day on the subject. Just nice to say that i've finally gotten a character, a Controller even, to lvl 50.
Also here is a pic of the Kheldian who is taking his place. It's his daughter from another time and dimension. As I said he's got quite the complicated story surrounding him now and it's kind of coming to fruition now.
I think that's about all of the updating that I can handle for one day on the subject. Just nice to say that i've finally gotten a character, a Controller even, to lvl 50.
2.01.2006
Nobody Expects the Spanish Inquisition...
So i had an interview with the City of Portland today. Now what really amazed me is that it probably could have been. I applied for a job as a plant engineer, which is essentially a glorified title for a service tech. I was expecting a one on one interview like with any other job...no I got to sit with a virtual jury of supervisors to answer vague questions about whatever they might have been thinking. There were no questions like 'Tell us about your experience working on boilers.' there was stuff like 'tell us about maintenances.' hell if i knew i was gonna be giving speeches i would have prepared something.
So I dunno if I got that job but I felt there wasn't a need to be interrogated by five people. Hell I've seen some of the people that work for the city, you'd think they'd just have a drop box and whatever name they picked out they hire. Don't get me wrong there's some good guys working for the city but a lot of them don't have licenses for DUI and such and some come in looking like they just woke up in the dumpster behind the building. oh well i'm sure there'll be something pop up sometime...
mahalo
So I dunno if I got that job but I felt there wasn't a need to be interrogated by five people. Hell I've seen some of the people that work for the city, you'd think they'd just have a drop box and whatever name they picked out they hire. Don't get me wrong there's some good guys working for the city but a lot of them don't have licenses for DUI and such and some come in looking like they just woke up in the dumpster behind the building. oh well i'm sure there'll be something pop up sometime...
mahalo