I'll see your Kerry Clayson and raise you a...

Which Presidential Candidate Are You?
Rung from Rum and Monkey's very own liberty bell.

El Presidente '04 I don't need a fucking running mate...i'm that good...

Top that one...

My Pimp Name is Master Brotherman.
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Where were you when...

What were you doing last week about midnight? What were you doing when the unthinkabnle happened and the Red Sox won the world series? The Sox are finally world champs and the curse is no more. IF nothing else happens this year you can say that you were here for a truly historic event. Red Sox fans, collectively known as the Red Sox Nation, for their lifelong devotion to seeing them finally win it, everywhere rejoiced, broke stuff, and generall y had a good time of it. How many people watched teh last out of the last inning and the little toss to first base and had flashbacks to '86 with Bill Buckner letting the ball dribble between his legs to lose it for them? I know I did. I've always loved the sox, and the other new england underdog teams that everybody seems to write off each year, yet for some reason have started to dominate in teh last few seasons. I would have to say that it's good to be back in new england. nowhere else in this country will you find such a large, and rabidly devoted group of sports fans. We love our teams and hope they do well each season. Congrats guys on finally breaking the curse....now I can die in peace...

Why the hell not...everybody else is...

1. WHAT IS YOUR FULL NAME? Michael Ellison Vance

2. WHAT COLOR PANTS ARE YOU WEARING? khaki shorts

3. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? Audioslave "show me how to live"
4. WHAT'S THE LAST THING YOU ATE? Turkey Sandwich...mmm, turkey

5. DO YOU WISH ON STARS? not in years

6. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? Brown

7. HOW IS THE WEATHER RIGHT NOW? Overcast and about 45

8. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? My dad

9. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT YOU THIS? Clayson...yeah i guess he's aight ;)

10. HOW OLD ARE YOU TODAY? 27

11. FAVORITE DRINK? normal: Vanilla Coke. Alcoholic: Four Horsemen
12. FAVORITE SPORT? Hockey

13. HAIR COLOR? Strawberry Blonde...or blonde depending on how much I've been out in the sun.

14. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? Nope

15. SIBLINGS? 1 brother

16. FAVORITE MONTH? March, my birthday. yay presents.

17. FAVORITE FOOD? Buffalo Wings

18. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Farenheight 9/11

19. FAVORITE DAY OF THE YEAR? XMAS@ Any day of the week starting with "S"

20. WHAT DO YOU DO TO VENT ANGER? I don't, I internalise everything so I'm a ball of boundless rage.

21. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD? my nintendo

22. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? Lucky Charms.

23. HUGS OR KISSES? Kisses...final answer

24. CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA? Chocolate

25. DO YOU WANT YOUR FRIENDS TO WRITE/ I-MAIL BACK? considering I'm probably the last one to respond...i think i'll let em slide on this one ;)

26. WHO IS MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? no one...they'll all already done it

27. WHO IS LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? see above

28. LIVING ARRANGEMENTS? baby x1, grandmother x1, wife x1, house x1
29. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? can't remember

30. WHAT IS UNDER YOUR BED? puzzles...lots of em

31. WHO IS THE FRIEND YOU HAVE HAD THE LONGEST? Have to be Chad

32. WHAT DID YOU DO LAST NIGHT? Played Diablo 2
33. FAVORITE SMELL? Village Candle's Summer Slices

34. WHAT INSPIRES YOU? Pressure....i'm a "Combat Medic" type personality

35. WHAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF? not being funny.

36. PLAIN, BUTTERED OR SALTED POPCORN? butter. enough so that my arteries harden while i'm still watching the movie

37. FAVORITE CAR? I dig the hell out of the Tiburons.

38. FAVORITE FLOWER? day lilly

39. NUMBER OF KEYS ON YOUR KEY RING? 5...and only 1 of them goes to my house
40. CAN YOU JUGGLE? my bills? certainly

41. FAVORITE DAY OF THE WEEK? any day beginning with "S"

42. WHAT DID YOU DO ON YOUR LAST BIRTHDAY? I don't remember
43. HOW MANY STATES HAVE YOU LIVED IN? 2

44. HOW MANY CITIES HAVE YOU LIVED IN? 2

45. HOW MANY COUNTRIES HAVE YOU LIVED IN? 1

46. HOW MANY CARS HAVE YOU HAD & WHAT WAS THE FIRST? 6, the first was an 85 chevy citation
47. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Portland, ME

48. HOW MANY TIMES WERE YOU MARRIED? 1

49. HOW MANY OFFSPRING? One

50. HOW MANY DIVORCES? 0

51. WHAT IS YOUR 1ST CHOICE...MONEY, HEALTH, POWER? Power most assuredly. and then, THE WORLD WILL BE MINE!!!

His first cake :) 

I Think You get the Idea...

This is just a quick and simple graphic I did for Yvonne's aptly named "Vote or Die" campaign she seems to be advertising in Clayson's LJ...btw feel free to link to the URL i uploaded this to if you want to add this to your site. it's not my bandwidth :)

I Fucking Knew It...

:: how jedi are you? ::

Goodbye to the Man of Steel

Goodbye to the Man of Steel 

I've been waiting to see the general consensus on this tragedy and it seems to be an overwhelming ratio. Everyone will miss Christopher Reeve. He did not want to be known as Superman but that was the role that inspired thousands of people, even gnereations later he still makes people believe that a man can fly. What it was that brought Superman to our lives was his personability and charity. He may be known as the Man of Steel but it was his support of the arts and later medical research for victims of paralysis that truly made him a hero.

How many people out there wrapped a blanket around your neck and pretended you could fly after seeing Superman? For how many of you after seeing him as Superman believe that there might actually be superheroes in the world? I know I did. He did so much with what he was given that it's truly astounding. DO the research and get back to me, you'll find there were causes for which weren't listed by the media short of the stem cell research that could have helped him so much. It truly is a tragedy and I hope everybody realises that we have just lost an actual superhero in this world. Godspeed Superman.

Interesting...

Well I got paid yesterday and bought a copy of Fahrenheit 9/11. I must say that it had effects similar to those sited from viewers of The Passion. I have to say that it kinda renewed my hatred of Dubya for me in a new way. Through the entirety of the fil you saw footage and connections that have been edited out by the "So Called Liberal Media". for any budding poltical, I'd highly recommend this movie. It's a good view certainly.

On another note I stuck it to the man again yesterday in what came to be my closest coming to vandalism in my efforts. While I was walking home I "liberated" a Bush/Cheney sign from someone's yard. I then wrote "I stuck it to the Man" on it in blue permanent marker and promptly headed to a close store. Once there (after cashing my check of course) I headed to the restroom, dropped the offending sign into the toilet and pissed on it.

In a related note I flipped off a guy walking down the street with a Bush/Cheney sign. I'm all about sticking it to the man this week...so where's your stories?

I've got mine...

I Stuck it to the Man Graphic 

I'll bet he gets respect now...

There's a lot to catch everybody up on, but as I'm sure you can tell from the title I'm going to start with something a little depressing. Rodney Dangerfield died yesterday afternoon. He was a great comedian and I enjoyed his routines and his movies immensely. I'm sure that I'm not the only ne that will sorely miss him.

On a lighter note however this week is shaping up nicely. I'm sure some of you (hopefully) will have the honored October 1st holiday. While not as well known as what will be abbreviated as S & BJ day in March, equally important to a well balanced year is National "Stick it to the Man" Day. I decided several years ago that October First would be a great day for it since my Octobers always seem to suck for some reason...why not just throw it back in teh face of "The Man". SO for the last several years I've been engaging in small acts of civil disobedience on October 1st. Last year I told the chick at McDonalds that I would in fact not be having an apple pie with my burger because I was "sticking it to the man". This year I didn't wear a uniform shirt to work, and when asked why I didn't wear the shirt, I promptly, and proudly, told my service manager that I was "sticking it to the man". So, since I'm sure the vast majority of you have forgotten about this holiday I'm gonna go one further in my quest to "Stick it to the Man". FOr this year, I'm gonna claim this whole week as "Stick it to the Man" week. So until Sunday night, I urge you all to stick it to the man in any way that you can find and please PLEASE leave me comments on here for how you've "Stuck it to the Man"

Here's the thing though...don't get arrested, and don't do anything stupid like skipping school or quitting your job to become a non-productive consumer in order to "Stick it to the Man." Those of you who leave me stories of your exploits, I will send you a graphic in honor of your perseverence in the face of "The Man"

In light of these last few paragraphs, work is going well, though there's a load of bullshit involving me not having a van and being expected to use my personal vehicle to get to jobs...I'm not too pleased about that one, and I did indeed "Stick it to the Man" on that one and let them know pretty outright that I would not in fact begoing mre than 3 miles in my vehicle to get to jobs as it was the end of my obligation to get to the shop.

You Learn Something New Everyday...

Enneagram Test Results Type 1 Perfectionism |||||||||||||||||| 75% Type 2 Helpfulness |||||||||||||||||| 80% Type 3 Image Focus |||||||||||||| 60% Type 4 Hypersensitivity |||||||||||| 41% Type 5 Detachment |||||||||||||||| 67% Type 6 Anxiety |||||||||||||||||| 74% Type 7 Adventurousness |||||||||||||||||| 74% Type 8 Aggressiveness |||||||||||| 47% Type 9 Calmness |||||||||||||||||| 72% Your Conscious-Surface type is 2w1 Your Unconscious-Overall type is 9w1

Take Free Enneagram Personality Test

Conscious self	Overall self

Take Free Enneagram Personality Test

Again with the didn't see it coming...

Congratulations, you make it until the end! You
are the strong, modestly good looking man or
woman who doesn't take it from anybody.

How fast would you die in a cheesy zombie flick?
brought to you by

Just because I have to now...

If any of you read Yvonne's LiveJournal you'll see that I indeed did get a new job, am making more money than at that "other" place and indeed sent a letter to the owner upon seeing a rather interesting Want Ad in the Press Herald. Anyway, for everybody's enjoyment, i'm going to post the letter that I sent to them.


Hello My name is Michael Vance.
Undoubtedly whoever reads this e-mail knows that I was a service tech up until about month ago. I was Laid off for lack of business and the fact that I had not gotten my licenses yet. However I had just moved back to Maine from Florida only 3 months before so had no way of having them. Time Simpson knew this when I was hired and said that I could do "refigeration while I learned boilers" direct quote. However I as laid off for not having them.
Another point is that I was paid less than the helpers were and when I was to get a little more it was decided that I shoud be laid off. So let me tell you what a surprise it was when I read in teh employment section that Pine State Sudden Service needed a new Service tech. And not just a service tech, but one who possesses all the requirements that seem to be taken directly off of my resume. If I was simply "laid off", why was I not contacted. Also if business is so slow why are you looking for someone who has all the qualifications of someone you had just laid off. I was the lowest paid employee in the HVAC or plumbing department and those who I was told were to be fired when I was hired are still there. To my knowledge I had never had a call back and in fact had saved quite a few of your service contracts including, but not limited to, Yale Cordage & Rosewood at Rye. I had also brought business such as TGI Fridays. I'm skilled at HVAC installation as well, but no one offered to move me to another department. I posess more Air Conditioning knowledge than a good deal of your techs there and yet I was the one to feel the axe.

In conlusion I feel I was taken advantage of with the promise of helping someone who had just moved to the state, and was obviously qualified enough to work for a pittance with promise of "substantial wages". I hope that someone actually reads this instead of just deleting it since this is a direct reflection upon the quality of work there.

Sincerely,
Michael Vance.

Now I received a response to this letter, rather surprisingly, from one of the office girls, who then handed it to the owner. There's a moral to this story, and those of you in this position will respect this, those who aren't...well you better heed my advise....Be NICE to the office girls. Even after you're gone they'll do nice things for you if you need them to. Thanks Ann for taking one for the team :)

I never saw this one coming...

The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Third Level of Hell!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level	Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)	Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)	Very Low
Level 2 (Lustful)	Very High
Level 3 (Gluttonous)	Very High
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)	Moderate
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)	Moderate
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)	Moderate
Level 7 (Violent)	High
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)	High
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)	Low

Take the Dante's" Inferno Test

Though I'd like to give a shout out...

To Robo-killer, like always ditching me in the middle of MY FUCKING CAPE MISSION, then coming back later and asking if i can help with his. Also for leaving in the middle of the invasion, WHEN WE WERE FUCKING SURROUNDED BY LVL 28 FUCKING RULARUU. thanks for the assist there big guy....Fuck you and fuck your cape. I'll wipe my ass with it if you ever get one...

The Rularuu Attack...

The Rularuu Invasion

For those of you who were unfortunately at work, or worse...play that other game, you missed out on an awesome event in Paragon City. The Rularuu invaded paragon at about noon yesterday and I am proud to say that E-Branch was there to help the embattled heroes defend their metropolis. With the aid of several other members of E-Branch including Talchazzar and Maxxis we helped keep paragon city safe from the enormous tide of alien invaders. It truly was a great battle and I think it would suffice to say that In-Between paid the ultimate price to the tune of about 14K in debt. And through his long hours of sacrifice and battle he earned his cape somewhere in the process. It truly was a good day to die...

It works with everything...

Dick Cheney insists on link between Al Qaeda and Kevin Bacon. Al Qaeda was trained by the CIA which was created by Harry Truman who dropped the bomb which was conceived by the Manhattan Project which was a movie starring John Lithgow who was in Footloose with Kevin Bacon.

The Hunter Speaketh...

Deep into the election year and there has been no word from my favorite journalist, Hunter S. Thompson. Surely I'd have thought he'd have something to say on this election. Well, after a little searching I found something, on the ESPN page 2 site of all places. here's the article that i have found. BEHOLD for the doctor speaketh:

Sean Penn called me last night and said he was quitting the movie business until after the football season.
"I am going on the road with Brett Favre and the boys," he said. "The Packers will kick ass this year, and I want to be part of it. I love Brett Favre."
His voice sounded strange, so I goaded him.
"The football season has been cancelled this year. The White House just announced it."
"No!" he shouted. "That's impossible! Football season will never be canceled in America -- not in an election year. There would be riots."
"Exactly," I replied. "Horrible riots every Sunday afternoon, in cities all over the country. Football fans will go crazy. I already feel the Fear."
It's true, but not because of our football season being canceled. No. We must have football. What would this country be without football in October?
That is a dangerous question, so I try not to worry. Only an imbecile would alienate every football freak in the country at a time like this.
It would be political suicide.
Would the President do a thing like that?
Who knows for sure? He is already muttering about "postponing" the whole election, and that is almost as ugly as canceling a football season.
These rumors are dark and disturbing, especially for a football addict in July. Take my word for it, because I am a certified addict. It makes me feel crazy on some days, and this is one of them.
I am a football addict, and I am not alone in this country. We are legion, and we must have football ... Yes. It is righteous, and only a jackass would cancel it.
Election years are always weird in America, and they always happen in football season. That is a fact of life. The President will always be elected on the first Tuesday in November, for good or ill, and not even Richard Nixon could change it. He hated anything that stood between him and a Green Bay Packers game, especially on Monday nights.
Nixon was a bad loser. He hated losing worse than death, and that is why I enjoyed him. We were both football fans, both addicts; and on some days, nothing else mattered.
But that was yesterday, and George Bush is now.
Where is Richard Nixon, now that we need him? He was crooked in every way and his hands were covered with blood -- but he was a rabid, high-rolling football fan with a sly taste for gin; and on some nights, he could be good company.
Ah, but we live in a new century now, and the president is not a football fan. The first real game of the season will be a huge event for most of us; but for young George Bush, it will mean nothing. He will feel no relief, no escape from the same sense of doom that fell on his father, only 12 years ago. The old man failed when he tried to get re-elected, and so will his son. They both peaked too soon, about six months before football season; and after that, they sank like punctured fish.
So the time has come to get busy on what we call "the summer book" in the business of gambling on presidential elections. And right now the London/Vegas numbers are about 51-49 percent for Bush, if only because he is the filthy-rich incumbent and the son of a global oil-industry magnate.
That is big in the politics business; but this year, it will not be enough to make up for all the wretched, disastrous failures of the Bush administration. Betting on George Bush to win this coming election would be like betting the Denver Broncos to win the Super Bowl.
My own whim at the moment says that John Kerry will win big in November, and that the Colts will finally win the Super Bowl. Why not? This is the year of the monkey, and George Bush will be lucky to get out of Washington without being put on trial for treason.
Yes sir, we are coming around to some bold visions now, but my time is running out. Next week, I will tell you what happens in America if Kerry loses this election, along with the current odds on whether there will be an election this year. Okay. Mahalo.

New IB...Now with Cape Action...